Reader matter:
I have to choose between two ladies. Please understand, I am not by any expectations dating each one of the ladies, and neither of them learn of some other yet. I request your final decision because You will find attempted several times previously and now have often hit a brick wall miserably or happen substantially let down.
With the very first girl, i possibly could see our entire life together. We met three months roughly in the past. We’ve got a fantastic connection, and I know it could possibly be something real whenever we want it to be.
Another lady We have identified since I ended up being 14. I might move the planet earth in the event it suggested the woman joy. We had gotten near to getting more someday but both choose never to. Both of us watched and helped both go through one poor connection after another.
She left a note on my page reminding me personally like in old movie that in case we are both 30 and not hitched, we have to get it done. After that she backed off. I understand she had gotten frightened that she might belong love and I also would harm the lady like plenty on the different males before me personally which screwed up. We backed off in addition.
We have been chatting much more things are acquiring to possibly being collectively once again.
I’m sure that when i would like the very first woman, she actually is all my own and that I was all hers. In the same token, I know I could love others woman all of our entire physical lives, but i must create their realize that I am about to be there for her whatever your situation.
Therefore I ask, perform I make the opportunity and opt for this new woman that may come to be the girl I was looking forward to my life time, or would I take to once more making use of woman who has been in many of my goals considering that the time I knew the lady?
I am aware rushing into a connection is actually bad, and I also will not be rushing with either of these two ladies.
-Jason V. (Nyc)
Expert’s Response:
Hey Jason,
To make it effortless on ourselves, let’s label the women as New lady and Old Girl. That simplify things. Have always been we cure you have merely understood unique lady for three months ? If so, after that the reason why is it possible you even be looking at spending the rest of your existence together with her? to begin with, that you do not know the lady. 2nd, that would probably frighten the bejeebers away from their and might cause a possible restraining purchase.
Now, let us discuss Old Girl. You known both for a time and it also appears like you’ve cared adequate to hold a relationship dealing with all those many years. In addition it seems like Old lady could possibly be the soul mate. What do you might think?
I would personally ask her to sit down down and talk, and address the lady with the same honesty you contacted this letter with. Tell the woman you’ve adored the lady because you happened to be 14, you are accomplished matchmaking about, and you’re prepared to acknowledge into the girl you have always wanted just what she ways to you.
All the best!
Kara